Lipozene

Ok I'll start off with saying "I'm not fat". My family thinks I'm obsessed with food and it nutrients, but I actually enjoy knowing what I put in my body. This is a HOOOOLE nutha blog, lemme get back to the subject at hand. Lipozene. So If I did get to change one more thing about my body it would be the love handles. They aren't bad, but they annoy the hell outta me. I'm bustin my ass to try n get this "V" body type and always feel like a "W" so of course all the true advertisements come on after 2am....remember the abs belt? It sent electronic pulses to your body. Hurt like hell, but fuck the pain! Gimme my GAWD DAYUM ABS! Ok, so I did get that when it was the fad but now the latest thing oooooh and ahhhhh is Lipozene.

So does it work? Does dirty give it two thumbs up? Well its hard to say. I took it for a month to see if it actually got rid of body fat and monitored myself daily with the Taylor Body Fat scale. No results. For me it's a two fingers down review. I think I may move to Hydroxycut and see if that'll help me get cut. I know I can't target weight loss (unless I go to bangkok! w00t w00t!) so I'll hafta work from the head down on these sides.

If you are heavier and use Lipozene, please comment and let me know your results. Only order the 30day trial period. You'll either see results or not...don't milk a dead cow! lol (I have no fuckin idea what that means! lol!)

~ cheers

Friday & Saturday

right so my job fucked my paycheck up this payperiod and made me do something I hadn't done since before Kuwait. GO into the savings account ~:-o
So thurs night I wasn't feelin like goin out n socializing. I just wanted to go home...have a beer and get some sleep. I think thats what happened thurs night, so lets go with that ^_^

Friday was fun...I met up with my buddy Christina...both of us bitched about our salaries and felt that shopping for clothes was the right answer. SOMEONE has to cause the financial crunch & stimulate the economy in America so we put on our brave faces and whipped out our Visa/MC.

Fuck a whole afternoon of shopping and I got me a nice shirt to wear that night. Christina went all out! She got herself a lil freak'um dress, new shoes...jewelry. She did it right....made me feel like a lil bitch! So that night we went out with my aunt & cousin to TOWN. Didn't see everyone there, but for the most part it was good times and sum good lookin guys.

Woke up Saturday and Christina felt that I had had the wii fit long enough to fuckin open and enjoy it....AND OMG! THat thing is sooooooo much fun! iLuv it! The scale is like 40 pounds off, so you feel good about urself ^_^
and the games\exercises are the shit! w00t w00t!....after that I went to spgfd to work on gettin this virus off my computer (which finally came off today!...trojan & worm! fun fun fun!). Got home round 9/10ish....Christian was doin a family bbq thing and invited me. That was a lot of fun. It reminded me of when I was young how the latino music was playing...the adults were drinkin, laughin...kids runnin around and ladies just gossipin. Felt like Cali for a minute...and Christian was soo cute, my spanish is like nil and one of his cousin's was like shit talkin me and he stuck he chest out n said "if u say somethin else to him i'm gonna punch you".....Awwwwww! lol! I thought that was cute! So this weekend was cool...I gotta prep up for next weekend.

Next weekend I'll be in NC for my uncle's memorial. My mom/pops are leavin friday night and my sis is leaving saturday night. Ok my thoughts on memorials/funerals. I don't take them seriously. I don't. Let's celebrate the life that was lived, drink and laugh about the good times. I think the day of death...even week was/is enough mourning. So I'd rather have fun @ Town on Friday night and go in Saturday to listen to all the crying. UNfortunately I think that would be SELFISH of me, so I'm just gonna hafta leave on Friday...suck it up and come Sunday night do shots of Patron. Yea...so this week at work can sorta kinda drag out....i don't mind!

Who wants cake? iLuv cake!

Today my best friend's daughter turned the big 1-0! So we all made plans to celebrate at the Olive Garden. Bad uncle Mike didn't get Hannah a present but the ringin of the phone opened that window of opportunity. Mummy didn't get a cake. SCORE!!! Uncle Mike-E gets the cake! w00t w00t! So I remember eatin sum good cupcake at Rob's bday party and lucky me live right next to cakelove.


Ok, so if ur a health nut and love readin the nutrition facts at ur restaurant/delicatessen, watch out for these sugar/butter whores! The minute I asked about ingredients they smiled and pointed their finger to the sign on the left. OMG! R u fuckin kidding me?!? How many kids & adults are obese in America that you guys got a sign of a thin family just leapin for joy....nice message! Now on the plus side (like ur jeans/dress size after indulging in said cake) the cake rocks! I had a small slice of Cynthia Sins.

"Cynthia's Sin - Sugar coated peanuts roasted until they're extra-crunchy are drizzled with caramel then smushed into pillows of peanut butter spiked buttercream—all between three layers of chocolate cake and under a thick coat of rich chocolate ganache. It's like a candy hurricane ripped through the bakery and left a present behind."

Ok, so who gained weigh just from readin that??? The price of a 6" cake and two vegan cupcakes came to $50. Let me repeat that as it bears repeating...a 6" cake and two cupcakes cost $50! I didn't catch the price when the lady rung me up, so I just whipped out the Visa and signed the receipt wide-eyed thinkin, well if they don't fuck us on the calories...LOL!

In conclusion if you're going after quality and can't seem to put on weight then this would be a "two thumbs" up in Dirty's book. However if ur prone to pickup fat from just dust then pocket the cash. The cakelove gets "two fingers" down. Go to whole foods and find sum cookies there. I will bake me a splenda chocolate cake or splenda oatmeal raisin cookies one day. I first have to learn how to use the stove. Just typin that out gives me a tingling down my spine!! =P

7am....too early ta light a fag?

first off, "GOOD MORNING WORLD!"
...that felt good!

It's real nice outside this am...I left the windows/balcony door open last night. It wasn't so much about conservation, my vent and wall that where the A/C unit is at is pretty damp. I have no idea why, I just know I got a new respect for property managers and tenants.
I try so hard not to bug Jen (my landlord) about stuff because I have tenants in TX and LOVE not hearing from them ^_^
...But I let her know about this....hopefully it's just a one time thing and i'll just hafta paint over it when I leave next February.

So....where am I gonna go? Its def not too early to think about! I'm looking at properties. Not feeling the condo thing (because stoopid co-owners like hikin the GAWD DAYUM condo fees!)...13% increase meeting happening this Saturday. Boooooo! Dirty gives them two fingers DOWN! Well my friend LuLu has left or excuse me is leaving Kuwait so that isn't as big of an interest as it could've been. Brussels will ALWAYS be on my mind...$$$ in DC wouldn't be bad. iLuv that I got my best friends here (Luv yah Chris n Tiff), my family and a friend.

Ok, so I'm going to blog about this one last time and then from here on out I will reference Marlon as "him". I haven't heard from him in past couple weeks. And it took putting the advice my friends were giving and turning it into energy. One special person that I met (thanks Babe) through my friend pushed me to where I needed to go. I'm not going to share the chat we had, but it was enough to lift my spirits and bulldoze the brick wall I had built myself. Letting go is hard...it's like giving up on someone. And if you see goodness in that person you don't want to let go. But if that person brings you disappointment and frustration...why put yourself through it?
Love is a two-way street...One person will always feel stronger about the other person. And if you can balance that off to a 40/60...60/40 ur gonna have a healthy relationship.

I've got a lot of things spinnin in my mind that I've went over...and I'm not gonna blog about it (not out of shame) just cause they're private and will stay in my head. Ok, enuf of this....

ISN'T IT FUCKING GORGEOUS OUTSIDE?!? =)
~XOXOX~ mikey

RE:POST ~*Poetic*~

It really hurt that you never called
And I think of you all the time
It hurt so much that I'm feelin poetic
And thinkin of ways to rhyme

I wrote you a message, sent you a text
No response was your reply
After day 3 the answer was clear
...'He's just another guy'

Letdowns will happen and baby I know that
So here is now where I start
Dust off my shoulders and move on to the next guy
someone who won't crush my heart

The emptiness that clouds my heart is opague and rather foggy
But the cloud has this bright streak..we'll call it my silver lining
The silver lining is what i learned from this cloud I built myself
I will always keep my guard up whenever dating, dancing, or dining

The past guys I've linked up with
I've treated pretty shallow
I blocked them off from my true self
so they can't make my heart feel hollow

The feeling is not satisfying to let people go
Your eyes tear and throat balls up to where you can't even speak
But then I look in the mirror, toughen myself up..Y?
Because I don't ever wanna to feel weak

Now my heart feels better
Probably because I wrote this poem
Letting go of someone special
Is like watching your child leave his home

And although I end this poem
I end it feeling somewhat incomplete
I lift my head up and dust my shoulders off
...for the feeling is not defeat!

Kathy @ Walter Reed

Gawd thank-you for creatin TiVO & DVR for us losers who can't work daytime hours. So I'm watchin Kathy Griffin: Life on the D-list and am truly just in awe as how much time this woman spends with the troops and does even prison tours. She rocks and of course I hope she stays on the D-List just cuz i don't want this celeb to let fame get to her head. That's all

Oh and I'll see that hooker on the 25th in my nosebleed D row seats! Cameron, I'm gonna get u fucked up and steal ur front row seats! Shots are on me asshole! >-P

B-o.....i need more weekends!

Aight so last Thurs i was kinda stressin at work cuz I actually got a fuckin assignment! So I put my oreo cookies down, wiped the potato chips off my marinara stained polo and put myself "in the zone". Ok, so when you review and make changes to an exchange server it is always best to do it when users aren't online. SO say if ur going to do maintenance to I dunno...Bangkok, you'd probably wanna do that between the hours 7am - 5pm EST. If you have an IQ higher than a fruit fly and grasp the concept of time and the earth's rotation then you're way too smart to be a contractor and I applaud you for that....However these knuckleheads didn't grasp time...stressed the hell out of me ON MY FRIDAY! and in the end I left work with no food in my tummy at 10pm to go to Apex hopefully bump into some peeps and of c0urse grab a drink n burn a fag or two.

Anyways I head to Apex and dammit...no dice! I refuse to go 2 cobalt's so after a drink or two I head out to light me fags on fire. So I'm out there gettin checked out by the fag hags who introduce me to their disasters "Luv it *wink*" and then I see this dood I met at town couple months back. The convo we had was awesome....we showed off our equipment 2 each other (Phones baby! Phones) and didn't swap numbers. Aight so I got Dwayne's number...he got mine. If something comes out of that, great...if not aight so be it! It was cool seein him again and now we got each other's number

Friday was freakin mega mega super busy! i really don't know why...maybe poor time management? Oh yeah that's right I had lunch with my grandma, followed by a walk or hike in Great Falls. That place is beautiful and i'll upload pix to this blog thingy! After an afternoon in the park "Awwww" we made it back to spgfd. GOt GUILTED into goin to the movies to see Tropic Thunder and *OINK OINK* grab a large popcorn w/butter, salt and Diet Coke ;)
The movie rocked! I loved the beginning commercials! They were freakin awesome! And the movie was cool, so y it got not so hot reviews is beyond me. I mean DUH it's no dark knight but come the fuck on! It's not like watching flies fuck! Oh, fav one liner from the movie: At least you got to pick your kid, I'm stuck with mine! AwEsom3 one liner for those who adopt!
So I went to Town..got a lil smashed...met my bois up there...actually saw a lot of peeps I knew! Stomache was in pain from the popcorn (eck! I better not be buildin up a tolerance for junk food!). Eventually the patron just started to kill/balance off the acid built up. So that told me more shots were to come! lol! Some drama went down that night too, but nuthin that good friends can't help each other wit (Besos Papi, find happiness)

Sat- Rock climbin in Alexandria with my boi Cam and Gary. That was fantastic! I didn't think that my upper-body could handle that after a night of drinkin but shit! I think I did well....Oh fuck that! I know I did well ;-D...It was cool, we got there and Gary was the 1st to go up the wall. Ummmm....this dood did the GAWD DAYUM wall in Demo time. I was like TIME! 90seconds...Aight Cam, beat that shit! lol! The 1st climb I went up I was on top but didn't get to touch the freakin beam! Dammit! So i flew down and literally couldn't stand up I was like a 5 yr old on a mat! So we did like 3 more climbs and had fun on kiddy hill. It was gravy...headed back to DC n had sum lunch. I forgot the name but their salads do NOT even compare to the Chopped Salad shop in Chinatown! mmmm....chopped salad!!! Ok got home to shower and txt Dwayne. Work work work...FINE! Called the house and found out we were havin dinner at my sis's work. O snap! Cheese for dinner, popcorn the day before??? Can I have a McFlabby for dessert? Aight so we head down there and I sooo much cheese that if I ate anotha bite I'd be on my knees like the olson twins singin alto to the porcelain gawd! It was freakin delicious but DAMN'd filling! So went home and had a nice 2hr nap. Wakey-wakey...chk'd what was up wit Dwayne, didn't feel like hittin Town up but wanted 2 toast my bartenda for climbin up the wall! I think i did end up hittin Town up...Was it crowded? Shit i 4got! I don't think we stayed that long if we went there. Crashed @ my boi's place and woke up to the sweeet smell of scotty's coffee! ^_^

Mmmmmm....best homemade coffeee ever! Headed to spgfd for family time and then work. Sunday's never are spectacular since those are my mondays but man!

Overall I kept busy n reconnected with peeps I hadn't seen in a while. That was awesome. I haven't heard from my forbidden fruit up in Cali in a while. It's probably best that way. I tell you the one person that I'll let fuck with my head is him, and it's only because I allow it. I love him, and that feeling will never die out. That I won't allow. But the realization of me and him never going to happen is easy to write say or type out. But having the emotion...having this realm..this fantasy to not become the reality I'd wish and lust after leaves a bittersweet taste in my mouth. I guess I hafta to learn to Unbind, Unleash, Relinquish, Release

(and no that poem did NOT go out to him!). I do know that when I find that someone special I won't compare them to him. Because it's not fair. But until some of these guys step their game up I'll just be single and blessed with good friends and if I'm lucky make new ones on the way.

~ besos

Can you CC into the future?

Ok so let's see...the Circuit City (NYSE:CC) took a huge risk when the board decided to layoff all senior sales associtates and bring in some young will work for minimum wage hot shots. I mean the mentality must've been "OMG! How can we be losing so much $$$ when we got the same hot shit BestBuy's got???"....think...think...smoke....think...*DING*! We're paying the Sr. Sales associates way too much $$$! Let's let them go, bring in some new guys and let them do the same thing the Sr's are doing! I'm sure our products will make up for the lack of training and sales experience they'll bring to the table! Besides, people would rather save $1 then have someone educated speak with them. We know consumers, they're clueless! Much like our decision making!
"All in favor of laying of Sr. Sales associates say 'Ai'" 'AI!!!!!!!!'...promotions around the board, great thinking team!

Ok, I do let my imagination run wild...but you get the gist! Now if you have time in your hectic schedule to watch TV or even subscribe to the Sunday newspapers you'll see that CC hasn't taken a dumbass pill in the marketing/PR department. So why oh why is their stock selling for $1.80? Ok, besides their management's AWFUL decision making and lackluster...excuse me! Blockbuster withdrawing their bid to purchase CC for $6 /share why not buy this company? Who (*achoo RADIO SHACK!*)...bless me! Who would want to buy into the Circuit City chain that also has a number of stores in the US and Internationally? Are we ready to let go of Circuit City and give Best Buy the monopoly? Who's competing with Best Buy? Wal*Mart?? I don't think that's a fair comparison...Radio Shack focuses on the electronic side of the house and has it's own branded products with some interesting gizmo's. Wouldn't it be great for Radio Shack to EXPAND their market to DVDs, TVs and offer a larger variety of products? Clearly it is NOT in Best Buy's best interest to purchase CC as I'm sure they would love the kill.

Also who's best interest is it that CC doesn't close down? That question has me think of AMD & Intel. AMD has gone down to chinatown, but if they go under who will Intel compete against? I don't think Microsoft & Apple would let AMD go belly up as they would have only one major-chip provider to turn to unless Apple wants to burn their own chips which I'm sure M$ would applaud as APPLE products start off with "Ooos and Ahhhs" followed soon after by TURN ON GAWD DAMMIT! if you got an iPhone or are on your 4th inferior Products on demand (iPod), can i get a Hell yah? LoL!

Ok but back to Circuit City...things to focus on: It's competitors (as a whole, not piece by piece), It's Board (CEO, CFO, ETC...), It's been in business since 1984, the economy (are we really in a recession? I still can't find parkin at the GAWD DaYm mall people!), the GAS factor (not petrol, does america Give A Shit?), the products they offer, the team (not just the Board), and finally who would benfit greatly by offering CC a buy out at say $4.50 p/sh? Hey Bear Stearns (NYSE: BSC) sold @ $2.00 a share, so $4.50 is nothing for those greedy bastards to sniff at!

Ok I gotta workout...will weekend blog in a bit!

much much better weekend

Ok i got 15mins to blog, so i'll edit this again later.

I ended work @ 1115ish Thur night and didn't feel like going home. The only place I could think to go to was loud obnoxious college kiddies APEX. So I remember seein peeps @ TOWN over there so was like, egh! WTF! Lets go!...So I go there and met up with some cool peeps and hung out. I saw Didier hangin against the wall and was like oh cool! So we fuckin danced and had good times and then I got to see this awesome townhouse, nicely decorated that he shared with Lena and I think someone else...it's so funny cuz the two days I went to Town Lena was all like "You were in my house". I told her I loved her pics and the house is gorgeous!

Friday came along and I wasn't gonna hang at Town but told D i'd meet him up there...blah blah blah. Wasn't really feelin the party but had an awesome time and thought..well even tho it's only 1230 lets leave while i'm still ahead before I get bored n pissed! Plus I had to meet my family in VA that am, go get robbie something for the party Cam had setup for him, party at Cam's...stop drinkin at 430 cuz ur ass hasta get home and host a party! ***MENTAL NOTE TO SELF: No one at Cam's party smoke :-o....I know, and me without a fag! EgH! White KnuCklin***
Left the party @ 5ish (Oh and ummmm chef boy-r-Cam knows how 2 cook! I luv food that doesn't cum from a microwave ^_^)...oh by the way, we're on Saturday!
Hosted my lil get together...played Wall-E & KungFu Panda on the big screen and had a spades game goin on. It was awesome! I haven't done that w/my best friends in a while. Marlon couldn't make it to DC so Christina took his place and we kicked ass ;)....Got everyone out by 11 and made it back to Town. Drink, shots, Drink, smoke....shots...shots...shots...Drink..smoke and u yeah, that was pretty fun. FUn enUf to call off on Sunday to clean my place and celebrate my grandmother's 80th birthday.

So Sunday was great cuz no one in my fam passed away this weekend...and I am still waiting for after labor day (my uncle's memorial) to get rid of family and take a break! Ok...15mins are up! Gotta go to work....how many days till Thurs?
....right!

On the lighter side....

I was out n aboot (use canadian accent) today and didn't have time to pack my dinner. I was already at safeway so I figure egh! Lets just grab sumthin here. Ok I am NOT a fan of TV/Frozen dinners. They are packed with preservatives/loaded with sodium. If I get one I try to ensure the sodium is below 550MG.

Well I now stay away from the Eating Right boxes by Lucerine because of all the crap they put in their products...so speaking of Krapt, ergh...Kraft :-P
South Beach Living. I've stayed away from Kraft (not their chesse tho) packaged foods ever since I saw what working mom's gave their kids for lunch (do you remember those wonderful Lunchables?!?) Ok, I've digressed....
So I'm looking at the frozen dinners they have and yes they looked good...so I saw Garlic Herb Chicken...hmmm, how much sodium is in THAT? 550mg (23% of the daily rec). Ok...borderline, but u made it. Ingredients; easy to read, some but not many things to look up..for the MOST part dirty approved (I'll post the ingredients at the bottom of the blog). This meal was delicious, only 240Cals (Check your bread in the fridge...if you're not eating nature's own, 2-3 slices make up this meal!), 23g of protein (Tuna eat your heart out!). What I don't like: Krapt! What's up with all the butter! 70mg in cholesterol?!? , 550MG sodium (hey I said you were borderline)...left me with hunger (and I don't eat fast).

Will I buy this again? Yes. Will I recommend it to others? Depends on their diet, water intake, and allergies (Milk & Nuts) but if you're overweight and looking to slim down, then yes! If you have high chol/high sodium then stay away...
I'm going to review other South Beach Dinners at Safeway tomorrow and see if/what catches my attention..and now the ingredients (I do this for people who search on google INGREDIENTS SOUTH BEACH GARLIC HERB CHICKEN...try it, I'll popup!) =P

On a side note when you look/gloss over ingredients, write them down on pen and paper. You'll see how much sodium you consume when you write/type it out (or other ingredients you are trying to avoid)

Ingredients: Fully Cooked Grilled White Meat Chicken Strips (Chicken Breast with Rib meat, water, modified food starch, salt, seasoning[white pepper, black pepper, garlic powder]) green beans, water, contains less than 2% of soybean oil, almonds, chicken stock, modified food starch, parsley, salt, garlic, dried garlic, chicken fat, vinegar, dried onions, whey (from milk), spice, enzyme modified butteroil, soy lecithin, guar gum, autolyed yeast extract, soy sauce (water, wheat, soybeans, salt), dehydrated butter, mustard flour, caramel color, wheat bran, wheat, molasses, flavour, annatto (color), turmeric (color)

RIP Uncle Rick

Wow...last week I had a great uncle pass and today I have an uncle pass. I was not close to my uncle rick, but am real close to my mom, grandmother and love my Uncle Pat. So...it's tearing me up inside that I can't be there in Phoenix (again) right now. She has no idea but I know that when my mom and pat walk to the door and she see's one son, one daughter...but not the other her heart is gonna drop to the floor.

Burying your child is something I never ever want to experience. Seeing my mom crying and only being able to hug her is all I can do. On a comical side I think about George Carlin (who also recently passed) and how he says people always come up to you and say "if there's anything I can do, let me know" and George says like what? Can you pull a resurrection?

I think if I had the power to do that, I wouldn't. My uncle had MS & Kennedy's Disease...so he's in a spot where they can't hurt him anymore. The thing that hurt my mom the most is that he died in an ambulance....alone. And that people sucks...I'm ready for a weekend that ends in joy. I'm dreading the call I have to make to my grandma. This call is going to be worse than her brother...her own son....the first of the kids. Last week her brother, now her son. I can not even phathom what would being going through my mind...My biggest fear is that she will lose her will to live. And I don't know....................................
<30mins>
my mom sent me a txt...my grandma knows and she and I feel the same feelings. I couldn't be strong for her...i was literally on the floor in a corner at my work building crying saying I was sorry. I really REALLY wish I could give her that hug! Ok I can't cry anymore...im back in the office

I'm tired right now but need to focus on what made me smile about Rick. He was the silver lining in the grey cloud that surrounded him. Dispite his diseases he carried a positive attitude and no matter what life threw is way he could laugh his way through it. That is the one thing I am striving to take from him and my great uncle daniel. The power of positive energy!
Rick-isms:
* I got one question for you....Who put the bomp in the bomp-a-bomp-a-bomp? Who put the ram in the ram-a-lam-a-ding-dong? Who put the bop in the bop sh-bop sh-bop? Who put the dip in the dip da dip da dip? Who was that man? I'd like to shake his hand, He made my baby fall in love with me.

* Give me 8! Ohhhh you can't do it! Only Jackie seems to be able to do it!

* I got two words for you and they're not "Happy Birthday"

* Michael you're a gentleman and a scholar I don't care what (whoever is near) says about you

* Two hands were a bouquet of middle fingers and he had a withering bouquet

...good therapy!

High NS = High Productivity

When I have a high NS day I can really feel my soul.
Whether it is in a euphoric state, or deep down in a hole
I tend to turn to alcohol, it helps me forget about the pain
Or I turn to poetry, like I'm doing once again!

The poem below was inspired by this "friend" of mine
Combined with my High NS, he finally crossed the line
I can dig one fuck up, maybe even two or three
but after that last one, I'll shake my head and leave

My true friends who know me, know me for who I am
I'm someone you can count on, I'm like "the family man"
With a heart of generosity and a smile on my face
No true friend would make you feel like you just won last place

So take a peek below and see what was inspired
Unbind, Unleash, Relinquish, Release - "My soul is very tired....."

Unbind, Unleash, Relinquish, Release

My soul is very tired and can not take it anymore
Pack your bags, leave your keys and don't slam the God Damn door

Delete my number from your phone
I'm moving on, there's no one home
From the worst times to the best
I put all these memories to rest
Never to be awaken; an endless sleep is where they'll lie
I walk away from these memories; let them wither away and die

Inside my mind I'm frustrated, tears are rolling down my eyes
I say these words in my head, take a deep breath and sigh

I unbind, I unleash, I relinquish, I release

The tingling down my spine, I got goosebumps on my arms
The flame that burns on this wick guards my soul from harm
I picture when I met you and the joy it brought to my life
Yet the way you fucked with my head, it cuts me like a knife

I unbind, I unleash, I relinquish, I release

Take these photos off my mirror, put them in this flame that burns
The smoke is getting darker and as I inhale my head turns
I'm blowing out this candle! Away black smoke I've reached my inner-peace

I unbind, I unleash, I relinquish, I release